2012: so far, so good

Busy. as. a. bee.

Enrolled in 12 credit hours (plus reading & writing time outside of class). Spend approx. 10 hours per week working at the CDC as an extern. Assist a professor 2-3 hours per week. Keep house and home from falling apart. Tend to hubby and critters.

Breathe. Stretch. Repeat.

I try to remind myself to savor the cool breeze of each jasmine-laden moment, because -- stressful though they may be -- they are fleeting. Soon the miserable heat of summer will be upon New Orleans, and I'll be in the thick of intensive Bar Exam Study. Then, with a little luck and plenty of moxie, come the cool breezes of autumn I'll be hard at work at my first Lawyering Job.

So it goes that, even though I'm constantly in a mad dash where I blink five times and it's Thursday again already, I'm trying to enjoy this these last Law Student weeks and days for what they're worth.

spring time in New Orleans

The weather is perfect: mid-70s and sunny with a breeze.

Flowers are everywhere, and there's verdant new growth cropping up on every branch, shrub, and vine.


The air, humid as always, is lush with the rich scents of wisteria, jasmine, and other mysterious blossoms unrecognizable to me.

It's so wonderful I'm having difficulty staying focused and on task. All I want to do is wander around and experience the beauty of each day, occasionally stopping to sit and wonder at my good fortune to be alive and well in such a lovely place. But law school finals lurk in the background, and anxiety never fails to disturb my tranquility. So I'm striving to find a balance between working diligently and not taking a single precious day for granted.

spring break

For the last 8 days I've done absolutely nothing productive. It's been beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

My vacation began with a jaunt up to Brandon, to spend the weekend with the in-laws. I enjoyed a belated birthday supper of steak and fried mushrooms and cauliflower, and the next night hubby and I cooked from-scratch jambalaya.

From there, we went to Jackson and spent a few days with old friends. While in Jackson we made sure to eat at the Thai House and Sakura Bana. And, of course, we spent our Tuesday night at the very best place to be in Jackson, Mississippi on a Tuesday night: Fenian's Pub.

On Wednesday, we went to McComb, and floated down the Homochitto River in kayaks with some new friends who are NOLA-McComb dual residents. (The kayaking, I must say, was incredibly fun -- much moreso than I imagined. I hope we can do it again this fall!) Then on Thursday we returned home, where our kitties were waiting.

Since returning home, I've done a few chores here and there, and Hubby and I have enjoyed cooking together in our own kitchen. Tomorrow, though, I must get serious again with my productivity. April 15th looms very near, meaning taxes must be done. And final exams will be over and done at 5pm on May 3 --one month from today, meaning outlining must begin without further delay.

For tonight though, I'll continue relaxing. And come tomorrow, I'll be grateful to have had such a restful, rejuvenating vacation to fortify me for the long, busy weeks to come.

beginnings and endings

Final grades for the Spring semester have been issued, and I managed to wrap up my tenure as a graduate student with a 4.0. Yay!

I only hope that I can keep up the momentum in law school. I doubt it, though. Perusing Tulane’s recent honorees leads me to believe that there must be one really difficult class, because all of the honorees – some of whom were at the top of their class – had GPAs in the 3.8 range. But I shall try my hardest and hope for the best.

People lately have been telling me “Congratulations,” and it still catches me by surprise. I was congratulated when I got married, and when I graduated last May, which makes sense to me. Going to law school doesn’t exactly strike me as the kind of thing one would be congratulated for – am I being commended for going into enormous debt? extolled for uprooting my family? praised for committing three more years of my life to more formal education? I suppose it is the achievement of getting accepted into a prestigious old law school that is being congratulated, but somehow it doesn’t feel like much of an achievement right now. No, right now it feels like a terrifying blind leap, taken on the chance and hope that this course will make a happier life for myself and my family in the long run.

Tulane offers me the following advice:

Relax this summer, and be ready to work hard when school starts.

And while that’s comforting to hear, the stress of the pending move makes it difficult. I know that it will all work out, but the uncertainty – the not yet knowing precisely how it all will unfold – is what eats away at me. As conscientious as I’d like to be – trying sometimes in vain to diligently make preparations and plans for The Move – in the end I realize that there’s only so much control I can exert on the way this chapter of my life shall end.

So I’ve lately resorted to reading The Witching Hour as a means to distract myself. And it seems to be working. That dense, lengthy Anne Rice novel which first caused me to fall in love with New Orleans does wonders to calm my nerves. And while offering the comfort of a previously read book, the story seems so much more vivid this time around, now that I have experienced the charm of the Crescent City first-hand, and it is no longer simply a made-up story-stage in my mind.

But this in-between time is bittersweet. Although my mind is mostly in New Orleans lately, my heart aches at certain Jackson sights. Like the flag pole in my cul-de-sac that's been crooked since the 4/4 tornado of 2008:


Something about these waning spring days strikes me as exceptionally splendid. Each magnolia blossom and cool crisp breeze brings a wave of nostalgia for something I haven’t even left yet, but which I know I will miss dearly. And though I know that this town will not fall off the face of the earth when I depart, I also know how it is to move away and return to a place you used to know intimately. Each change – a new building here, a widened street there – seems forced and artificial when you’re not around to witness a city’s organic growth. So it goes that I know visiting will never be the same, even as my time here goes shorter with each sunset. And even while I mourn my absence from this place that’s come to be my home over the last decade, I eagerly await building a new life, as a law student at Tulane University. It is so very exciting, after all.

spring ahead

I can hardly believe that it's March already! But sure enough, mid-terms are upon me, the vibrant colors are spring are sprouting up all around, and warmer weather has arrived.

For whatever reason this semester has been more of a challenge for me than last. (I mostly blame the pol sci class.) 'Tis certainly a challenge I can meet, but it has required a substantial investment of my time and mental energy, leaving me little time for idle blogging, or cooking, or doing much of anything at all at my own pace. And I don't mean to complain, because I'm making much progress in my pursuit of knowledge. Although much of my progress has been intangible thus far, my mind is nevertheless steadily absorbing a more detailed, nuanced understanding of the world around me, which is always a good thing.

And truly, being super-busy is a welcome distraction from fretting about my future, because through all of this, the Grad-School-Admissions-Decision Waiting Game continues. I've been rejected by three of my chosen schools, albeit the three most selective. I've been accepted to Tulane Law School, but I've not yet received a response from the History Department to know fully what my options are. Nevertheless, this news has been of great comfort to my confidence, which had been mightily bruised by the slew of rejections.

So I continue to wait, cultivating the virtue of patience all the while, knowing not where I might fund myself this autumn, or what I might be doing...

Also in the way of encouraging developments: I'm in talks with my pol sci professor (who happens to be the chair of the department) about doing some assistantship work for him. I believe that I could provide some invaluable organizational assistance to such a busy academic as Professor Orey -- what with my 6+ years of experience keeping busy attorneys organized -- even while adding a sparkling new category to my curriculum vitae. As with much else, only time will tell what might come of this...

Meanwhile, after months of mulling around possible topics, I've reached the point of beginning a new research paper in earnest. (More on that later, in a new post.)

Something I've been telling myself lately is that I should endeavor to blog more; to use these pages as a utility to help me think complex concepts though, to catalog my many ideas and interests, and to help me expand my vocabulary. As Dr. Davis once told me, writing is a performance art, and for that reason blogging can do me naught but good as an aspiring writer.

But I won't fret too much about not having made the time lately to devote to blogging, for I can (and likely will) always aspire to do better. Overall I'm doing quite well with the balancing act of work, home, and school, and I simply must come to terms with my tendency to want to over-achieve. I must remind myself that, at the end of the day, my best will almost always be good enough.